In the book A Simpler Life there is a chapter about retiring early and not waiting until real “retirement”.
The word “retire” invokes certain respect. When you say “I don’t do x thing” or “I don’t like X” when it’s expected that you should, people will surely judge or ask questions.
Personally, I don’t like to go to the beach anymore. But if I say, “I don’t like the beach” people will react as if I’m insane. Instead, I say: that I retired from taking beach vacations.
Today, I retire from consuming the news and shitty algorithm-pleasing media.
This is a retirement that can’t wait. I am disgusted by what the media (and social media influencers) publish everywhere. I do not need to know any of it.
In the book they suggest you ask yourself: what do I need to know to live my daily life?
When I look at the news websites, I realize that not much.
I only need to know if the metro is running normally on Tuesdays. It’s the only day I venture downtown. And it’s the only day I am confronted face-on by things I don’t need the news for: Homelessness, mental health problems, drugs, garbage, dirtiness, endless streams of cars with a single driver in them. It’s the day I feel the temperature and freak out. It’s November and we’re having temperatures of 20 degrees Celsius and above. Not normal.
So I don’t need to read about climate collapse, elections, cruelty, genocide, the risks of AI, entire countries annihilating women and children, or the brutal treatment of animals. Countries run by gangs, countries run by organized crime. I don’t need to know about any of it.
For most of my life, I’ve strived to be informed, educated, and in the loop of current events. I’ve hated feeling ignorant but it turns out that after 2016 knowing about current events has decimated my mental health.
I am going through one of the worst episodes of insomnia in my life. Usually, I get through cycles of insomnia which break with a couple of pills. But it’s been more than twelve months since I slept naturally through the night.
The climate crisis is mostly to blame, but the invasion of American politics in every aspect of our lives, the influence of American “culture”, and their election have put me in such a state that I alone cannot resolve, hence sleeping pills.
Waking up on Wednesday, November 6 felt like such a defeat.
I cannot deal with this for another four years. I cannot see this man’s face, this man’s name every day in every news outlet. I cannot read about the things he will do, about how he will never be accountable for any of it. And I said: I retire.
I retire from caring. We are collapsing and me being sleepless, with my body aching all over, questioning if there’s a point to anything is just fucking stupid. Until Canada approves medical assisted dying for the desperate, I’m stuck here.
So I retire. I will no longer read news outlets. I will defend myself from the torrent of horrible that is coming. I will put blinders on, those are never out of fashion.
For the first time in my life, I believe ignorance is bliss. The most valuable resource I have is my attention. I won’t give it anymore.
Human nature is unmatched in its greed, lack of compassion, sincerity and goodness.
More than ever, I want to retire from the world because things are not getting better, and will never get better. History has shown us there is no limit to human cruelty.
There is not much we can do and very little we can trust.
Sadness doesn’t begin to cover it. My insomnia and subsequent pill-popping nights are the results of caring and “keeping informed”.
David Benatar said it best: Better Never to Have Been.
My religion is “practical pessimism" which according to David Benatar is a way to approach life with a sense of realism about suffering and meaninglessness, while still managing daily existence. Unlike philosophical pessimism, which emphasizes life's inherent suffering and futility, practical pessimism seeks a way to navigate life’s challenges without being overwhelmed by despair.
Gather your attention. Starve the algorithm. Practice information self-defence, take care of your creativity and pamper your senses.
“Do no harm, leave no trace”. That’s my ambition in life.
Humans have created beautiful, beautiful things too. I want to focus on that.
Inter alia:
The only podcast I was waiting to listen to after the American election was The Culture We Deserve. And if you are still in shock, in this week’s episode they did an excellent analysis of some of the favourable working-class policies that were approved even in states that the guy won. Plus they’re always spontaneously funny.
A really good show with a very boring name on Apple TV: Criminal Record.
I bought two beautiful synthetic watercolour brushes from Rosemary and Co, my favourite art materials shop in Canada.
I stumbled upon the book by Hazel Soan, The Art of the Limited Palette. Though I have no ambition to paint any of the subject matters in the book, it has taught me so much about pigments! I’ve been trying to reduce the materials I use and this is a great step in that direction.
This beautiful book about Symbolism feels like home.
Next issue I hope to share more art-related stuff than this downer. But I’m not sorry. Sometimes one has to let out one’s despair.
Thank you for reading,
Luisa